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The Anguished Child

From October 2013: "I thought of what a good, personal, and loving God I serve - and this evening I feel like a misunderstood anguished child." Have you ever had a day like this?  This is almost my every day.  My sweet husband teased me once calling me "a woman in conflict."  I was defensive at the time and still don't want to own that as my identity.  As a daughter in Christ, I shouldn't!  Nevertheless, as a very real human on this earth, I am truly, always in conflict.   Paul states in Romans 7:15, "For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate." (ESV) Our days are filled with joys and toils.  It is easy to go from one moment rejoicing and the next mourning.  We are fickle humans and while we rejoice in what is good, we carry out what is evil.  Let this rest on your hearts tonight.  While you may find yourself at the end of the day kicking and screaming at the Lord like an anguished

Fun Quiz Questions

Saw this on another blog that encouraged readers to repost and put in their own answers. So just to brighten the day, here is a little fun Q&A time: What is your favorite indulgence? Ice Cream and a Rom. Com. What is your favorite cocktail? Virgin Strawberry Daquiri The clothing item you can’t live without? This has been discussed with friends and we concluded though it may not always be our favorite, you can't live without undergarments... Your favorite current workout song? On Top of the World by Imagine Dragons What is your favorite way to sweat? Zuuuumba and Ice Skating! Your favorite new band?  All Sons & Daughters Your favorite color? Mint  Where did you grow up?  New York What is your favorite TV show? Ugly Betty Any embarrassing accidents?  plenty I'm sure What was your first job?  Page at the library What was the name of your first pet? Baby Whiskers... the hamster What’s the one thing you refuse to share? My pillow If you had to move to anot

Beauty

Cool crisp autumn air. A sunset shining through slate colored clouds. A single leaf slowly floats to the ground. I'm listening to The City of Prague Philharmonic's "Love Theme" from Romeo & Juliet... "If you find my beloved, tell him that I am sick with love." Song of Solomon 5:8 Thank you My Lord for this moment of beauty.

Full Dependence

As I reflect on my graduate student experience coming to a close I have much to ponder. First, how quickly this has already come and gone and second, where am I headed next? It has certainly been a year of humbling, stretching, and breaking, but also one of discovery and independence and joy. While, like anyone, I can be prone to get stuck in pity parties when things are not going my way, today I am happy to say it's all been worth it. A life with our Father, Son, and Holy Spirit is enough. This is the message that God has been relentlessly working on my heart this year. I still don't fully get it, don't know if I ever will, but it has definitely been an overarching theme for my life in this particular last year.    He has been exposing my selfish tendencies, my prideful actions, and my sin in general. He has also reminded me of my great great need for Him and His unfailing grace. This morning we took communion at church and I thought about the deep deep desire I have to

Willowbrook: Unforgotten

Yesterday we watched this movie in my class.  Here is the trailer for those interested: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=liMhBbl7NDk I've seen it before in undergrad as well. In the 1970's Geraldo Rivera did a film expose on the treatment of over 5000 individuals with mental and physical disabilities who were institutionalized in this "school" on Staten Island.  I was once again brought to tears. Tears that wondered how anyone could treat human beings so inhumanely and tears that asked how God could have allowed such suffering.  I know He felt the pain thousands of times more than me because He knew and created each one of those individuals.  Some He would welcome home and some will have died never believing in Christ as their Savior.  I have no answer to this question, I just was pondering it and needed to put it out there for the world. Especially today being September 11th, I think a lot of people are asking that question - believers and unbelievers alike. Why does

A Renewed Resolve

Written on the back of a prayer request card during one church service this past summer... Pull the scales from my eyes Rip them one by one A calloused heart I've contended with But the battle shall be done. The fruit of life comes laboriously As mediocrity ensnares But break me loose of complacency In whatever this life fares. Take up the armor to fight the fight and when weary just to stand Do not settle for less than Christ I'll live for His commands.

Prayers for the girl I've never met...

I was reminded by a professor the other day that in our field of Speech-Language Pathology some of our clients may not live to even 25 years of age. That is why we want to give them the best quality of life while they live.  I agreed, but as she said it an overwhelming emotion ran over me with the reminder that this is not the only life. I cannot exactly explain the feeling itself, but it was one of those times where I was grateful to God for the opportunity to speak into the lives of others and broken hearted by how much I have missed sharing the Gospel thus far.  I do not know to what extent I will be able to share the truth with my clients, but I am a Christian before I am an SLP. Of course, I want them to live full and meaningful lives on earth and being able to help them communicate will do that, but I know that apart from Christ, there will never be such a true joy in this life. I do know that in heaven my clients will be able to walk, run, sing, and praise the Name of the Lord f